Tag Archive: ruminations


My 2010 to-do list

Filed Under: Uncategorized
Jan.06, 2010

It’s now 2010, and the holidays are over. We are officially in January. No question about it. Just look at your friendly neighborhood thermometer if you have any doubts.

This isn’t about resolutions. This is about plans. A to-do list. It’s getting filled up. Only thing is, where do I start?

In no particular order …

–It’s time for me to get another desktop computer. I made the decision a few months ago, but I opted to hold off on deciding the specs for it until after the hectic holidays. The hectic holidays are now history.

I think I got my present computer in early 2006–it’s a Windows XP machine. In the last few months, it has been developing more and more problems. When you turn it on, it takes 15 to 20 minutes before you can actually use it. That’s been the case for a while. It’s slow. Lately, it has had problems installing new software–the pop-up box claims that the downloaded file is corrupt. But the same file works on my other machines. Lots of old programs clutter up its hard drive and its registry–even those I got rid of long ago.

My older son has already put in a claim for the machine–wants to experiment, turning it into a server. I have two external hard drives, where the photo and music files are stored, so transferring that stuff shouldn’t be much of a challenge. As for everything else … it’s not going to take overnight.

First things first. I need to decide what specs I want, and then look to see what I can get for what price. My old one is a Dell. The one before that was an HP. Both developed problems as they got older. Computers seem to do that.

Not sure which brand I will get this time, but it will be a Windows 7 machine. That much is certain. I am nowhere near cool enough to even think of getting an Apple.

–Another thing is the big back-up. At times last year, I worked on copying all my old blog posts from efx2blogs.com. I hadn’t done that for a long time–just did a batch of them earlier today.

That has to be a priority item because hardly anyone is using efx2blogs.com, and when the current domain registry ends in March, I think it may go bye-bye forever. Keith, who used to run the place there, surfaced last spring just long enough to renew the registry and then disappeared again. Flyingdutchman.com.

I have 338 entries there (so they say), and I am copying them to my Blogger blog, one at a time. I still have 10 pages of listings to go. Once I finish copying them all to Blogger, I can import them over here. The photo links won’t work, but I don’t expect people to look at them anyway. Just for the archives. I spent a lot of time writing those posts, and I don’t want that “creativity” to be lost.

–My other big project is over here, at efx3. I don’t like that purple theme I now have, and I need to find a new one, a brighter one, one that can accommodate photos the width I like to post.

Once I look through all the efx3 themes–haven’t had a lot of time for that lately–and choose one I like, I’ll ask Welshpixie to make a few modifications to make it look the way I want (such as changing to the Georgia font and making the main display area wide enough). I tried doing that myself in the past, but it took a lot of time and was amateur work at best. Let’s call in the professionals and get the job done right.

Once it’s done, things will be much brighter and cheery over here. That cheery outlook then will help inspire me to write more and play around with more pictures from my many adventures. And misadventures.

Because I like to write over here … even if I haven’t done much of it in recent months. I also enjoy reading and commenting on others’ posts. Another thing I haven’t done a lot. Now is a good time to get back to that, too.

So I’m not going away. In fact, I’m coming back. That’s another item in my 2010 to-do list.

Tags: ,
read more

“60″ in the rear-view mirror

Filed Under: Uncategorized
Dec.31, 2009

My wife and I had a nice holiday season with my son visiting from Detroit. He had a laptop nearby 24/7 because of his job–monitoring computers elsewhere. No problems on his watch.

We had a good time and watched a bunch of movies. “The Blues Brothers.” “Anvil”–he said I’d like it, and he was right. “Public Enemies” from 2009 and “Girl Shy” by Harold Lloyd from the 1920s.

When his younger brother came over, it became a Pinky and the Brain festival. The megalomaniacal mouse is unforgettable. As the snows fell and the winds blew it around, Brain keeps trying to take over the world. My older son said he’d have a lot better chance at success if his schemes weren’t so grandiose. But that wouldn’t be the Brain, would it?

I also passed a personal milestone. This one was marked with a two-digit number: 60. I drove past that little “60″ sign a week ago. Not that the world is any different on the other side. It’s almost identical. And I haven’t changed, either. I’m trying to take care of myself. For the most part, I’m doing OK.

Starting Friday, I will also be entering my eighth different decade. True, I was only in the 1940s for eight days. But it counts.

Passing that “60″ sign isn’t an achievement. To me, 60 is 59+1, just as 61 will be 60+1. But I notice that I am (ahem, yes) more aware of the ages of people in the obituaries and of others who aren’t feeling so well. I am. My back is in good shape, my legs are strong, I don’t have problems with my heart or lungs or stomach, I usually sleep well, my mind is strong, and I still enjoy sex. I am taking meds for high blood pressure. I weigh a little more than I would like (about 220), but I’m eating better and healthier than in the past–1% milk, whole grain breads, not as much caffeine or sugar. Never had to worry about quitting smoking.

So I think I’ll be around for a while yet. My hair is gray in only a few places, and I still have nearly all of it–and it still grows thickly. I also feel I have gotten wiser over time. Not as impatient as I used to be. Better able to accept things and people the way they are, not as I want them to be.

The key to that was learning to love myself the way I am, and then feeling free to love others they way they are. I grew in new ways–I learned about neopaganism and polyamory, met some wonderful new friends and new ways of living. I didn’t do this to reject my past. It’s adding to my life, not replacing other parts. I did it to discover new worlds and become a better, more happier human being. That’s what it’s all about, isn’t it?

Really, these last few years have been wonderful for me. I don’t get as much free time as I want, and that really bothers me at times. But I am growing and becoming a better person.

So when I drove past that “60″ sign, it was a non-event. I am what I am. I enjoy life, and I am happy.

The event went virtually unnoticed at home. My wife made ravioli for supper that night, which my older son and I both enjoy. That was about it.

But I did get some gifts from B in that “treasure chest” she sent me. I finally opened it. What did I find inside?

I got a variety of Alaskan syrups, most of which I had never heard of before (“lingonberry”? “salmonberry”?). I got some Alaskan preserves, for sandwiches and such. She sent a few DVDs she had made herself from their recorder–a couple movies and documentaries. She sent me a Deepak Chopra book on CD (“Ageless Body, Timeless Mind”) about growing older and presumably better.

She also sent me “Santa Claus Blues.” This was a real surprise and the biggest treat.

“Santa Claus Blues” is a CD collection of Christmas-themed Big Band music put out by Canada’s Jass Records in the late ’80s or early ’90s. Jass released a series of very interesting CDs before the company disappeared, and I had the foresight to grab many of them when I saw them. Many were sex-inspired, some were drug-themed, and some had to do with holidays. All feature music and musicians from the ’20s, ’30s and ’40s.

Among their CDs was “Halloween Stomp,” which I copied and sent to B this fall. Halloween-style music from the ’30s and ’40s, plus short clips from cartoons of the era. Great fun to listen to. I may have mentioned to her that Jass had released a Christmas CD also, and I think I saw it one time, but I opted for the Halloween CD … and had been fruitlessly looking for it ever since.

She managed to find it. I’m impressed.

****
The holidays are not quite over. For New Year’s Eve, my wife and I will stay home and watch a couple movies and maybe enjoy a little wine. We’ll stay up till just after 11 p.m. (Central Time), to watch the merriment on Times Square, and then it’s off to bed for us. Yeah, we lead a wild life.

On Friday, my wife watches the Rose Parade, I watch a little of the the Holiday Classic hockey game from Boston, and then we get in the car and drive to visit her sisters and brothers for a couple days. We drive back Sunday. The weather is expected to be quite cold–subzero at night, not much above zero during the day.

Better make sure the Ipod is charged up.

Tags: ,
read more

Waiting for something good

Filed Under: Uncategorized
Aug.10, 2009

There is a saying … something along the lines of “Fatigue makes cowards of us all.” I think Vince Lombardi is credited with it.

He was probably referring to football, but I guess it applies to other aspects of life as well. I’ve been feeling really tired lately, and I haven’t exactly been feeling brave and bold, either. Coincidence?

Some things have been bothering me that I know shouldn’t be. It’s that simple. I’ve been tired lately, and I haven’t been able to turn off the worry and fears. Where is that switch, anyhow?

Emotions are mixed up. Maybe my mood will be better in a little while. Some things I’m trying to do feel a lot like banging my head against the wall. I’m so impatient for something good to happen to me. And I am trying my hardest. But that effort hasn’t made any difference. When I work hard at something and see those efforts fail, I tend to get disappointed and depressed. So that’s where I’ve been at.

Maybe I ought to be more relaxed about things, let go and take a “whatever!” attitude. But that isn’t easy for me, especially when it really matters to me.

If you don’t know (if you are fairly new to my writings), be advised that I can throw as good a pity party for myself as anybody. I really can. Take some weariness, mix in discouragement, stir in impatience, put it in a 300-degree oven for 20 mintues, and it’s ready.

At those times I tend to forget a few things. Or I focus on some things and forget about others.

I tend to forget that I am the only one responsible for my own happiness. Nobody else is–just me. So if I’m going to be happy, it’s all up to me. What I need to do is reflect on the good things and not worry about the others. Change what I can do something about. Accept what I can’t do anything about. Be wise enough to know the difference.

If you have been following along, you know a few of these concerns already. The canceled weekend planned with B. The work load all summer (supposedly my slow time of the year). The house that hasn’t sold.

I can tell you a few more. A big one is my late aunt’s nephew, who was the executor of her estate … and who evidently has embezzled a lot of the money. He is facing criminal charges now but pleaded not guilty at the arraignment, which drags out the whole process further. My aunt died in the first weeks of 2007. The trial won’t be until the spring of 2010. Sentencing may be in the summer. Restitution to the estate: who knows? Will I live that long?

Then … I’d like to get another car. I’ve had my present car for six years now, and it has 166K on it. That’s 267K kilometers. But it’s still doing well, still gets pretty good gas mileage. And still is just as small as it’s ever been. Until my aunt’s estate gets settled or my mom’s house sells, though, I won’t be in the market. Not that I’m planning to spend a lot, either.

(By the way, Cash for Clunkers doesn’t apply to vehicles that still get about 36 mpg.)

There’s one more I could tell you about. But I sure don’t want to scandalize all of you by telling you about my search for a special friend, one who lives close enough that I could visit her once in a while–every month, more or less.

I am searching. I am trying. I know she must be out there. But I don’t want to upset those of you who hold fast to traditional beliefs on marriage, so I won’t tell you about that.

****
My wife and I took a mini-vacation trip last week. Photos and stories to come. We went to some odd places and had one really odd adventure involving my cell phone.

But it’s late and I’m tired. Time to post this and get some sleep. After all, isn’t it the lack of sleep that is at the crux of all this?

Tags:
read more
Powered by WordPress. Theme: Motion by 85ideas.